A teensy bit scared

There’s this wonderful thread on breastcancer.org where you can do a “cancer sucks in this specific way” sort of post. A place to vent and rant. And rant people do, and you know what happens with rants after you really get into them? Funny, funny stories. Nothing like some dark humor to lighten one’s day.

Here is my “this sucks” post from yesterday (note not a hilarious rant, sorry):

Think I need to file today under “it could be worse.” Right?! Small cyst showed up on my liver u/s, of course they have to c/t it. The doc calls and says “I’ll be here all day, call anytime.” Freaks my sh*& out to get that kind of super-nice message from a doc. So I go get a latte, try not to cry, take some deep breaths, call her, and her aide schedules the c/t for first thing tomorrow morning. For goodness sake, with that kind of urgency you’d think something was really wrong. Plus NPO I go again tomorrow….

All I’m thinking is nooooooooo….I want to live in ignorance……I want this week to be the week that I don’t know that I have mets or a new primary or whatever for a long long time, I want this week to be the week that I am still NED forever. I mean, why the rush, ya know?! Unless the docs are just bored…sheesh……

And for my loved ones reading – my PCP, who I do adore because she’s even more cautious than I am (can that be?!), said that it is more than likely a benign hemangioma. So let’s go with that theory for now. I’m just tired of tests.


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Filed under breast cancer, quality of life, screening

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